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I’ve found a lot of Onion headlines pretty mid and uninspired recently, but this one is aces. No notes.
Removed by mod
The new ownership group is Global Tetrahedron. According to their website, they were “born of the shadows, and are committed to control in all its forms.” They’ve also donated “300,000 guns to underprivileged communities”.
My understanding is that the name itself is from older onion articles where when they needed an evil corporation name that is what they used. So they are indeed super fans.