Retrofuturism: Clever houses would do everything for you, just get back and relax. Your personal assistant would get you whiskey with ice and put some jazzy vinyl for a good evening.

Actual future: You did what to me stupid human? BTW, there are 99+ notifications from our furniture and our partners. Oh, and your toilet paper subscription is due tommorow, don’t think you’d get away with unscrewing the lock this time, I’d watch the shit of you!

just put a fucking spring on the fucking door (like a weak one)