Use it to fill the holes in your canoe?

14 million is 4% of 345 million (~American population.) Yes, 96% of America thought he wasn’t gonna run again.

Did Putin tell Moscow Mitch to say that? Was it Monsanto? Or, did he have his own thought for once?

Add in hysterical, blood-vessel-throbbing shrieks at the person in front, and you’ve just described my mom’s driving. It’s terrifying to ride anywhere with her.

You’re right, he never said the exact words. But all of America was under the impression he was gonna step back. He never used the direct words to dispell that either. I’m not alone in feeling betrayed by Biden.

I used to work in a pizza place, and the head cook was from Mexico working on his citizenship. He helped me with my Spanish, and I’d help him with his English. One day, we discovered that jokes was a good way to discover any loss in translations, so jokes became our preferred method of conversation.

One day he said he’s got a great joke, but he’s not sure if it’ll work in English, so he’s asks to tell me if it works. I tell him to hit me. The joke:

A guy and his girlfriend have been together long enough to move in with each other. Being a new(ish) couple, they’re still pretty frisky. Every time they’re finished and basking in the after glow, she plays with his junk, just gently kneading the balls in their sack. After a few months, he asks her why does she always play with his balls afterwards. She looks him dead in the eye with a Mona Lisa smile, gently kisses his lips and whispers in his ear “because i miss mine.”

He asked if the joke works in English. When i quit laughing, i said it does. That was 2006, and it’s still one of my favorite jokes to this day.

I’m seeing this meme get as much airtime as the whole “I’m a Navy seal” copypasta, and I’m not complaining.

Are you a xenomorph…?

Looks like obstruction is back on the menu, boys.

I agree completely, but your comment begs the question: can you supply a picture of Trump that isn’t? He always looks like mummified foreskin wearing a cotton candy toupee to me.

He also let everyone believe he was just gonna run for one term. Then, when election season comes around, when asked if he was gonna step aside and that most Americans would like him to not run, his response?

“Watch me.”

Fuck you, Jack. FUCK. YOU.

Sorry. If it’s not playground rules, then it’s just mayhem.

You still here? You’re not living in a DE-lux apartment in the sky yet?

cough cough “Born Again” cough cough

Isn’t God infallible? So, how did he fuck you up the first time? Gotta take a mulligan? Sounds legit.

I’m pretty sure bubonic plague isn’t noticing, either.

Doesn’t begin and end with the same letter! You’re out!

…llllfonso.

Right this way, Brandon.

Now now, I’m sure the constant screaming of the sacrifice children at the annual Pot Luck/Sacrifice Orgy had an effect, too.

That should’ve been stuffed into a sack and thrown over a bridge before ever seeing the light of day.