I’ve never been stung by a bee either! I’ve had a wasp get me a few times but bees and I have a unspoken truce, I guess. We have carpender bees all around our house and my wife hates them but I enjoy watching them have those valiant mid-air dog fights. Those little bastards can scrap. They never bother or dive bomb me but sometimes they get curious and kinda hover around me, presumably doing a bee’s version of a vibe check. I dont run or swat at them and they just peace out after maybe 15-20 seconds and then ignore me next time Im outside in “their” territory. … My wife on the other hand, swats, screams and runs from them and they’ll straight up go after her. She clearly does not pass the vibe check. It’s wild.

It’s absolutely safe to put your PS5 in the microwave.

You can put it in the fridge and It will be okay to play on for a couple more days.

🌈 shareholders 🌈

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+40 - look at all those youngsters taking things so seriously. They’ve forgotten it’s just a game.

Guys! Guys, please think of the poor shareholders tho. Aren’t they the real victims here? My heart break this evening knowing they almost had to endure very slightly reduced profits this quarter. Thank God there was something that could be done to prevent such a horrific situation.

“Baitin’” Friggin hilarious. Judge is an American treasure.

I said, SHUT UP! I’m watching “Ow My Balls!”

Remember that one friend you had who’s parents would let them play DOOM so your group of friends would all go over to their house and take turns being exposed to all the blood and violence a kid could ever hope for? That was me. I was that kid with the young cool parents.

Shit, I remember when our public library got some fancy new computers with an internet connection which was super high tech at the time. Two of my buddies and I rode our bikes down there and we couldn’t believe how cool this new thing called a “chatroom” was. Like… there were other people on there just talking to each other, long distance, mind you, and FOR FREE?!?!?!

Jokes on you tho. I’ve been desperately sick and stuck inside with air conditioning and cats🫅 battling that deadly virus that shut the world down a few years ago which scientists expect may happen more and more often bc climate change (pfff… whatever nerds). It was nice and cool in here, so I don’t know what the crying is all about. Just burry your head as deep as possible and the most dense and tightly packed sand you can get ahold of and, voilá, problem solved once and for all!

Someone should have told my exwife this handy life hack. Would have saved me untold grief and depression. However, life can throw you a beautiful little surprise after a nightmare. If it wasn’t for that godawful woman, I never would have met the love of my life, the woman who I spent my whole life waiting for and now enjoying what it means to be happily married to my biggest crush, my best friend and waking up right next to her and our little family every morning. I can safely say it was all worth it. It could have been easier to get here but I’d do it again on legendary difficulty if I had to.

That’s not a very polite way of speaking about your wife.

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…And my guy can’t find shit.

Ngl, Bethan has good taste in rocks. This was the right call by both parties.

🥾😛 “look how much we love the sensual flavor of your boots, Baddy Daddy Trump. Will you fuck our wife’s next, pretty please?🔥💗🔥💗🔥💗”

shout from the back “Mine first!!!”

Drowned out of his 11th story window.

They forget how many of us gun owning liberals there are. They think they can bully everyone around because they think they own all the guns thus the upper hand. They’re are far too dense to realize they’re entirely wrong. We just don’t make it our entire personality. I don’t feel the need to put my guns on display to prove to people I don’t even know what a MaNlY rUgGeD BaDaSs I am. That’s not why i own them. I very much enjoy the sport and technical knowledge and focus required to hit the target in different situations. I want to be perceived as a loving husband and a kind and honorable man and friend. Those two things are at odds. Or maybe I’m just not insecure about my masculinity.