I’ll take “discussions I won’t get into with a transwoman unless I know her incredibly well and probably not even then” for $1000, Alex.

I explicitly denied that several times, as you can see.

word.

To be clear, Ada has her own imperatives and her own community, and I’m not here to judge how she runs her instance. lemmy.blahaj.zone means a lot to a lot of people, and as a queer weirdo myself I appreciate that a place like it exists on the lemmyverse.

At this point Ada apparently had some communication with @gavi@lemmynsfw.com on Matrix, to which I was not privy. He told me, and I said that I had responded to Ada via Lemmy message. He had to step away, so I took over correspondence with Ada via Matrix.

As requested, the correspondence between me and the blahaj admin, posted with her permission. It started with this message (her* original message is on the bottom, my reply is on top):

• I had used “they” for Ada earlier, which was mistaken. My apologies.

As a horny queer person I, too, wish that this had gone a different way.

Jailbait is by definition people that are under legal age, or at least pretending to be. If someone is of legal age they by definition cannot be jailbait. The appeal there is the violation of the statutory taboo, the allure of the forbidden fruit. That is not OK and we won’t tolerate that.

If a grownup has a round face and is wearing braces, which is the post that I suspect launched this whole kerfluffle, that’s just how they look. I’m not going to tell them that they can’t be sexy, or you that you can’t be into them being sexy, because of their face or their dental work. Now, you can see why someone might be concerned that someone that has braces might be underage, since many people that are underage have braces. But once we’ve confirmed that they aren’t underage, that should be the end of it.