No, I’m not.

“America is not a racist country.”

–Nikki Haley at the Republican National Convention

Has anyone seen my lost shaker of salt?

Fuck this timeline.

Absolutely insane that anyone was buying this garbage at any price.

That bribery money wasn’t going to launder itself.

Sounds over-priced.

Demagogues gonna demagogue.

Hello fellow human, I too have been abducted by a Roomba.

Oh please let Steward Health Care find out about this.

I thought they already brought Starliner back a few days ago?

Surely this leopard won’t eat my face.

I can hear Musk’s little heart going “pitter-patter, pitter-patter” all the way from here on the east coast.

AI Models Generate Misinformation about Presidential Candidates.

Fixed.

At this point, I think they are actively trying to drive us away.

No no no, Mexico is sending us their rapists, we’re not sending them our rapists.

Singular? Doubtful.

My wife’s going to be pissed when she gets that call…

“All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.”

Youssef said he might return to the platform if his safety concerns for his loved ones are resolved

Drama queen.

Is there a GoFundMe where I can donate for buying their tickets?