People just don’t care about you that much, if you go into the street wearing nail polish as a a male presenting person no one will care if you don’t act weird about it. Same thing for shaving your legs.
Family might care though, what helped me was understanding that I spend a few days per year with my family maximum, but I spend that whole time with myself. So who cares what they think be yourself.
This helped me start transitioning at 19
How to properly manage a budget and how do credit cards work
Your own happiness is more important that somebody else’s happiness.
Not to say you shouldn’t be nice or help people, or invest in other people’s growth.
But don’t do it to the detriment of your own.
Your high school diploma. Nobody ever asks for it. No job I have ever held has asked for proof that I completed high school which I didn’t. My last job had a class they wanted me to take at a night school and that’s when they realized I didn’t have it after 7 years of competent, exceptional work, so they just shrugged and got me in there anyways
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Any work or study done during an all-nighter is a waste.
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If you meet someone and all they do is talk about themselves, they won’t be a good friend.
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Nobody really cares how you look or what you wear. And anyone who does has bigger issues they would rather not deal with.
Any work or study done during an all-nighter is a waste.
Depends. I did some of my best work at this time (private project. not for my actual workplace).
I sense ADHD (source: am ADHD)
Maybe ;)
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Grace Periods.
I’m glad I know them now, because for the longest time, I thought I was in a fucked situation whenever my finances were tight. Like if I was due a bill and my pay cannot cover it because of the dates being different. It used to make think that I had to take a hit and just roll with it. But no, some of my bills allow me a brief grace period where I can gather resources in time. Sometimes I’ll even stretch my money beyond some grace periods if it means that I can upkeep some resources then just pay the difference later.
You can just ask people out. You can just ask to kiss someone. I was in my mid 20s when someone told me the first one, and late 20s when someone told me the second one. Dating got a lot easier after each revelation.
I agree with your comment in general, but it does depend entirely on the context and the situation. Eg, at work, you can’t just ask someone out. That’s a sure fire way to end up in front of HR.
You can just ask people out.
I know I can, but you think I dare do that?
I’m a perfectionist and I realized I’ve been making life too hard for myself. Choosing a low bar for success but keeping the ceiling high has felt like a much healthier approach.
“Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly” I try to remind myself, with a history of postponing things, and not wanting to imperfectly do things. Rarely I’ve regretted doing to my current ability, but countless times leaving things undone.
The consultant’s proverb: done is better than perfect
Between a pragmatist and a perfectionist, one of them sleeps soundly and knows what he’s doing tomorrow.
I was never going to “find myself” and so I should have just gone to college with my friends for computer science and made the good money when jobs were easier to get even though I had no interest at all in it. Hindsight is 20/20 and all that jazz. Now I’m a worthless schmuck in a factory living in someone’s garage paying their mortgage in rent prices.
All my interests are hobbies, some of them even too expensive for me to do lol they’re nothing you can monetize.
All my interests are hobbies, some of them even too expensive for me to do lol they’re nothing you can monetize.
Work is for making money, hobbies are for spending money. I think a lot of people mix that up and lose their enjoyment; money changes your perspective on why you’re doing something.
Take heart: had you done comp sci just for the money, you’d be where you are now. Comp sci isn’t for people in for the money but for people who find it exciting and have no idea their career is timesheets. :-p
No, really: I saw a LOT of people flame out of the programme, and most of them admitted they were in it for the payday.
That’s so true. I studied Ba. Information Technology for two years in 2004-2005 and dropped out due to family reasons, then I went back 10 years later and did Ba. Software Engineering in 2013-2016.
In both instances, it was clear about half those enrolled in the programme were only in it for the money, you could tell that some people were just not excited about software. They were the ones who had dropped out by the end of first year.
The other lot were those who did find it exciting, but severely underestimated the difficulty of the discipline. These were the kind of people who have can edit game config files to add a bunch of mods to Skyrim, they consider themselves a tech wiz want to study to be a game developer. But they barely pass intro to Web programming with html and JS in the first year and fail the first oracle database course in second year. I had some good friends who failed out hard in second year of software engineering for that reason.
Relationships can be anything you want them to be. I wish I spent less time trying to figure out if someone liked me and just tried to have fun with everyone I met.
Compound interest.
That it doesn’t matter what other people think of me as long as I’m happy.
It doesn’t matter what other people think, full stop. The world is full of people who think they know better. ignore them.
I think there’s a balance. if you really don’t care anymore, you’ll become a bad person that nobody wants around
Brushing teeth regularly, and flossing , is more important than I ever realized.
Man good dental hygiene is one of those things you just do not think about until you’re older. Flossing, interdental, mouth wash (before brushing), regularly visiting the hygienist and dentist. Your teeth evolved to last 35-ish years, the rest only happens from hygiene.
I’m dreading the day my bad mouth hygiene will catch up to me… I know how bad it is but I still can’t get myself to brush every night.
If you’re like me, then some time in your thirties. I didn’t brush from early teens through until then - I had several abcesses and needed seven teeth removed, including my top fronts. Turns out I had undiagnosed autism, depression and low self image. Now I do brush, and it’s just a case of forcing myself to adapt to a routine. Even keeping some flouride mouthwash handy for a quick swill every now and then helps a bit. Hope you find your way.
Have you tried putting your toothbrush and toothpaste in the shower? I’ve struggled with brushing my whole life and this is the only thing I’ve ever tried that actually worked. I also put a brush and paste at every sink but the only time I can ever actually manage to brush is in the shower.
Brush whilst the water is heating up means you’re doing your bit to help the environment! And other such half truths I tell myself to get through the day.
The sunk cost fallacy is a very easy way to get stuck being miserable.
Sometimes a drastic change might be painful at the time but will be much better for you overall.
Definitely agree with this one
Being a good person is a weakness in capitalist civilizations.
Its a super power, actually. Everytime I meet one they impact my life so deeply I can’t help but admire them and completely swoon.
Oh, please. It’s most definitely not.
Agree. If you were 100% capitalist and everything you did was about money, then maybe. But most of us balance that for the benefit of our mental health and, well, not being a dick.
