• Eyck_of_denesle@lemmy.zip
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    40
    arrow-down
    8
    ·
    7 days ago

    Etiquette one I don’t agree. It’s just being respectful and mindful. You will acknowledge it once you see the absolute lack of it.

    • Apytele@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      58
      ·
      6 days ago

      One of the things my parents did understand correctly as “new money” is that a significant portion of piddling etiquette rules about what color to wear at what times of the year and which fork goes on the left were largely ways for the bourgeoisie to attempt to maintain their advanced standing against the increases in (the potential for) equality that capitalism initially brought about. Unfortunately my parents are also a very “well we got ours so everyone else must be lazy” type of people who think that’s as good as equality can or should get.

    • apotheotic (she/her)@beehaw.org
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      36
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      6 days ago

      Except etiquette extends beyond just “common social etiquette”. Using a knife and fork the “correct way” is etiquette. Eating soup by scooping the spoon away from oneself is etiquette. Placing your cutlery the correct way on the dish when you’re finished is etiquette and varies wildly by country. These are just examples of dining etiquette, there’s much more. Its all bullshit and I agree it should boil down to being respectful and mindful, but depending who raised you it may happen that you get reprimanded and punished for not following very arbitrary rules.

    • 7bicycles [he/him]@hexbear.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      26
      ·
      7 days ago

      I don’t think this means “Etiquette (please and thank you)”, I think this means “Etiquette (look at this rube using his crab fork to grab pasta, what a yokel)”

      • Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        18
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        7 days ago

        Even cursive writing was not designed to be faster like my teacher said, it was to weed out the yokels from the gentlemen. A Thomas Jefferson-style hand, full of curlicues and serifs and f/s-es (i.e.“difcufsion” for discussion) could be read or written by a person whose wealth enabled their education, but not by someone whose literacy was achieved by reading the family Bible and local newspaper.

    • LwL@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      15
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      6 days ago

      Really depends on what part of it. There are things like offering your bus seat to someone who needs it, or waiting for people to exit before you enter. Those indeed make sense.

      And then there’s what the other commenters pointed out, arbitrary rules about what cutlery to use and in which hand and such.

    • LANIK2000@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      20
      ·
      6 days ago

      Considering every culture has completely different etiquette, I’d argue otherwise. We’re talking drinking from bowls vs talking during a meal style stuff. I’ll hold my fork with the right hand and knife in left, despite being right handed and no etiquette freak can stop me!

      • threeganzi@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        13
        ·
        6 days ago

        Yeah, if anyone is bothered by which hand I hold my fork in, I’d say they should see a therapist and work it out on their end.

    • Draedron@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      6 days ago

      Why the fuck does it matter how I hold my forkor what spoon I eat soup with? Why does it matter where my ellbows are?