• m0darn@lemmy.ca
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    4 days ago

    I’ve never heard anyone say that phrase, is it possible that people use that expression to mean “a man likes to feel like a man… not a machine”? Ie he has thoughts, emotions, and priorities. He is not a commodity, his worth is more than just profit he can produce.

    Not that women don’t also have those attributes, just that “man” is being used as an outdated shorthand for humanity.

    • abysmalpoptart@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      I’m not sure how i feel about the post altogether. I mean, i understand that toxic masculinity is bad, but this post needs some assumptions and context to make me want to side with it. For example, if I saw some guy just kinda minding his business doing silly guy stuff and the context was he wants to “feel like a man,” i don’t think i would be offended or concerned?

      r/justguysbeingdudes comes to mind

      • TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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        4 days ago

        I’ve heard this one before from my conservative grandma, It’s when a girl is doing something manly that the guy ““should”” be doing. Like if a girl is carrying in all the groceries while a guy is just watching someone would say “let [guy] do it, he’s supposed to feel like a man”

        This came up a lot as my sister is very much a ‘do it yourself’ kinda gal whereas her (now ex) boyfriend wasn’t much of an initiative taker.

        It’s not about a guy not doing manly things, it’s about stopping women from doing manly things.
        (also note I’m using ‘manly’ in the stereotypical terms, not how I personally see them)

        • abysmalpoptart@lemmy.world
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          4 days ago

          Again, that’s added context. I don’t know how feeling like a man is stopping a women from anything. I don’t think that’s a necessary component of the statement at all, though i appreciate the reply

      • kshade@lemmy.world
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        4 days ago

        It probably is about feeling useful/needed. That’s what men are taught to measure their self-worth in.

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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      4 days ago

      It’s hard to tell from the context, but it felt to me more like something a right-wing guy with really unrealistic expectations says to their soon to be ex-girlfriend (or possibly to the fiance in the marriage the church arranged) about how they need to be the one in charge.

      • m0darn@lemmy.ca
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        3 days ago

        Yeah I think we should believe that the witness correctly interpreted the meaning in the given context, but we shouldn’t assume that everyone that says it means it like that. It’s context dependant.